How many times does it happen, that you look at yourself in the mirror and think, “I will look better if I lose some weight,” or “only if I had a better complexion,” or along the lines of “I would feel better about myself only if I could change this one thing about me.” Or you feel burdened by society’s standard of what beauty is. Like there are monumental hurdles you need to cross to start loving yourself. If any of this sounds similar to you, then my friend, read on!
All of us have been exposed to negative body image or diet culture at some point of time in our lives. How many times has it happened that no matter what you do, fashionable clothes and pretty jewelry you wear, amazing makeup you apply, you still feel dissatisfied with yourself?? You will keep feeling this way until the change comes from within. This change will come when you learn to keep loving yourself and appreciate your body for being the way it is. Of course, this change doesn’t happen overnight, but there is always help available for you on this life-changing journey.
I read this quote somewhere, “You glow differently when your confidence is fueled by belief in yourself instead of validation from others.” Here are a few things that you can do to start loving yourself.
Steps to loving yourself
- I have a self, and I deserve love
You all know that you exist. But what you also need to know is where you stop and someone else starts influencing your thoughts. The first step in learning to love yourself is that you need to notice yourself. And once you learn to do that, loving yourself won’t be far. Love isn’t a feeling, it’s a choice. A choice that you need to make consistently. - Your looks are not the problem, you never were!
Celebrating your body is very important. Don’t hide that acne, proudly wear those stretchmarks. What you don’t like about yourself has nothing to do with your physical appearance. It is something within yourself that’s reflecting out, making you feel unconfident, unattractive, or ill at ease. You need to honor your body. Thank it for the way it is and show yourself some love through those long showers, lengthy skincare routines, yoga, meditation, and exercise! - Choose what makes you comfortable and confident.
Just as life changes and evolves, our body goes through the same. You probably won’t fit in your old dresses, you probably have some fine lines on your face. But hey, that’s proof of how you have had various experiences and learnings. Don’t avoid doing something you really loved to do or try and lose weight to fit into that old jeans or look for a color that will make your skin tone look slightly fair. Just go and shop for something that will make you feel comfortable, something that you feel confident in. Your body is not meant to fit and complement clothes, clothes are meant for your body. In the end, it’s all about wearing what works best for you. - Say no to negativity
Kids absorb what they see. This is true even for adults, especially when certain information is continuously in your periphery. If you once clicked on an ad that says its product will clear your skin of spots, the algorithm of your social media is going to keep showing you similar ads continuously. And unconsciously you do keep thinking of those spots you have on your body, making you conscious. Just click unfollow or unsubscribe to such content. Instead, look for something that promotes body positivity or something that will make you happy about yourself. Today there is no dearth of influencers, authors, or speakers who use social media to promote body positivity. Search for them, follow them.
Negativity also presents itself in other ways, like some people around you that have always been those voices in your head telling you- you are fat, you don’t have appropriate skin color, you are not pretty enough. These people lead you to compare yourself to others. You simply need to distance yourself from such people. Start practicing body positivity and self-love. There are many ways that you can practice leading yourself to feel comfortable in your own skin and reaching a place of body neutrality.
Robert Morley said, “To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness”
This sounds so deep when you take a moment to think about it. People often say sentences that sound pretty big, but at their core, they have a very simple meaning. For some, it takes a while to understand the implications, but when they do, there is no turning back!
